Thursday, June 25, 2015

Children of Asian immigrants say 'thank you' to their parents

The Diokno family, circa 1961. My parents, Felicidad and Melchor, are seated in front.
ONCE, I was giving a speech at a dedication of a mural depicting the immigration of Filipinos to the United States. I managed to slip in the landing in Morro Bay in California, Manila Village, sugar cane workers in Hawaii, the Alaskeros and farmworkers, then suddenly ... I got choked up. I had to pause to fight back tears. I had rehearsed the speech (sorta) and knew what I was going to say but the well of emotion that overcame me was totally unexpected.

When I was giving the short speech about Filipino immigration to the U.S. and the hardships they endured, I was also talking about the journey of my own parents, who had to leave all that was comfortable, all that was familiar, their families, friends and barrios full of more relatives in order to make the trek here for a better life for their children. 

I thought of the discrimination that they encountered here even as they didn't recognize it as such: not getting the promotion, not being able to buy homes in certain neighborhoods, receiving poor service in stores and restaurants, being invisible and overlooked by the dominant culture, and all the small slights ("racial micro aggressions" is the current term) that build and build. In most cases, they were too proud to complain. They couldn't even bring themselves to complain about their beloved adopted country. "Discrimination, bigotry, racism," those words were not in their vocabulary. 


Only as an adult, when I recall instances and actions that they faced, did I realize what they had to put up with in order to make sure that I had a comfortable life, a good education, a productive career and a future much better than they could ever have imagined in the Philippines. 

The difficult choices they made in the 1940s to immigrate to a foreign land, as a young couple with their three young children, set off a chain of events that has left a lasting legacy for scores of their descendants, some of whom may not even know their names: Melchor and Felicidad. Our family, now into it's fifth generation of Filipino Americans, owe so much to them. The life I'm able to live today is the fulfillment of my parents' long-ago dreams.

That's why I was on the verge of tears at the speaker's podium. Everything my parents had done, all their sacrifices, what those triumphs have meant to scores of children they will never know - came crashing down on me. I took a deep breath and somehow finished the brief speech without totally losing my composure completely. Whew! 

To my parents, and to all the immigrant parents from countries around the world who aspire for a better life for their children, I give my most sincere and humble gratitude.

Watch these young Asian Americans as they give thanks to their immigrant parents, but first, have a box of Kleenex nearby. Thanks to Buzzfeed for the video.


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